The Pet Squadron/Trailer transcripts

The following is a collection of trailer transcripts for the 2004 live-action/computer-animated satirical action-comedy film, The Pet Squadron.

Comic-Con 2003 teaser trailer
(MPAA green screen)

(Universal Pictures logo)

(Fade to an exterior view of a bathroom. The camera slowly zooms in on a porcelain. We cut to a close-up of the bathroom door being swung open by a small black hand.)

Text: From the deviants behind The Definition of Malefaction...

(We fade to a dimly-lit shot of a feminine rat, named Ava, swimming through narrow toilet pipes, as though it were a maze. She stops midway through as she finds a pocket of air and takes a few gulps from it. We cut back to the bathroom, where a mysterious figure, quickly revealed to be a skunk, walks towards the porcelain.)

Text: And the director of How the Grinch Stole Christmas...

(Ava swims up through the toilet bowl and breaches the surface, gasping for air. She flickers her eyes open and finds the aforementioned skunk, named Jodie, sitting on the toilet seat and smiling down upon her.)

Jodie: (waves) Hi!

Ava: What the...?

Text: Comes the ultimate love letter to every popular action vehicle known to man...

Jodie: I can't believe this is finally happening; me, face to face with a member of the Pet Squadron! (squees) I'm geeking out!

Ava: Well, pleasure to meet you, Miss...

Jodie: The name's Jodie.

Text: ...and buddy comedies.

Jodie: So what brings you here?

Ava: (looks at her surroundings) Dammit! Must've taken a detour. (to Jodie) Well, I hate to disappoint a fan, but duty calls. (points up at the handle) If you don't mind, could you pull down that handle for me?

(Jodie leaps up to the handle and pulls it down with force, commencing the draining process.)

Ava: (waves Jodie goodbye as she is spun around the bowl) 'Til we meet again! (takes a deep breath as she is pulled down the drain)

More coming soon!